A friend once told me that he liked my writing and that I should keep doing it. I felt good and believed him for about a minute. Then, as usual, I reverted back to being an insecure asshole about it. It's so hard to believe in yourself when you're too busy being stuck in a bubble that's bound to burst at any minute. Also, it's hard to keep feeling good about yourself. I'm afraid that the day I start feeling truly satisfied about myself and my work is the day I stop getting better. But the twisted truth is that constantly beating yourself up also halts any sense of accomplishment. Sure, you're being challenged. But you're also lowering your self-esteem every single time. The year is about to end. Again. Maybe this is futile, but I really want to work on my insecurities especially when it comes to the things I do. How do I go about that? How does one look insecurity in the eye and tell it to fuck off?
I'm not done with 2012 yet though. It's been such an amazing year and there's more in store in the coming weeks. I think I lived this year to the fullest. The next will be even better as always. As always. :)