Let me 'Unfriend' you

Warning: Author may have been called a hater once or twice in her life. Possibly much more than that.


I have a love/hate relationship with social media.


If I could, I would delete my Facebook account and I know I would be a much happier person. On the other hand, I can't. It's not like someone put a gun to my head, forcing me to keep on oversharing through pointless statuses and browse through hundreds of baby photos. It's that some of the people I know and somewhat care about, I can only reach through that godforsaken website. "Well, if you really care about that person, why don't you try to get his/her phone number at least?" says a trolling smart ass. It's complicated, okay?


I've travelled quite a bit and have made friends all over the world. Phone calls aren't an option because apart from my pathetic telephone skills, it would also mean arranging when is best for both parties. How the hell do you do that easily if not for Facebook messaging? There's email, but the kind of friends I have does NOT take email as seriously as I do. See the conflict here?


I have a friend who deleted his Facebook page two years ago and I was really envious of him for a while. Imagine having that kind of freedom from everyone's bullshit. I think I'd be less angry since I wouldn't have much to be angry about. But who knows? So back to that friend... It was really brave of him. For a while. Because guess what? He's now back. Tsk tsk. You've reached this far, man! Two years!


I admit, I was once annoying on Facebook. Maybe I still am, but I can't speak for my Facebook friends. By annoying, I mean I've uploaded about four dozen photo albums that up to this day I can't find the heart to delete. I dumped every piece of memory there from a number of beach vacations with friends to bored Photobooth sessions in between classes, and, yes, couple photos too. I would blame the innoncence of my youth, but I know deep down, I enjoyed the instant gratification that the site offered. Even people who weren't in the photos would like and comment on them. It was exciting because it was so new. Next thing you know, I was uploading photos of myself after a new haircut just to see who would care enough to like it or comment on it.


Should I take it as a sign of maturity that I've now grown tired of Facebook and everything that I once found so exciting about it? I no longer care about my feed. I know they're my friends, but I really don't care whether or not their baby bumps have increased an inch since their last update (yesterday). Yes, we were once seat mates in Biology and while we may have touched on our respective love lives in one of our many small talks during class, I do not enjoy reading lyrics from songs that you associate with your now ex. I refuse to participate in your quest for virtual sympathy. I am sorry though. Also, those insincere Happy Birthday greetings. I'm sure not even 10% of the people who greet me on my birthday would remember if it weren't for Facebook.


Is it mean or heartless of me to say that I do not care? I don't think so! I am simply a human being with a very low threshold for unimportant information. I can only process so much in a single day and so I would like to be very selective from now on. I've been working towards this by deleting Facebook friends every other day. So far, I've gone down from having a thousand to a mere 700. That's still a lot and I know in my heart that there's no way I have that many "friends". How did I go about deleting those 300? Simple. I would read my feed and whenever I'd see one that's particularly annoying, or made me question who the hell that person was, I'd go ahead and unfriend that shit. So simple.


I just want a clutter-free, hassle-free, drama-free Facebook feed. I'm sure that's not a lot to ask. Instead of just complaining about it, I complain AND do something about it. Heck yeah.